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Amanda Harper
January 21, 2017 12:17 pm
As much as we’d like to believe, maintaining a long term relationship is not always as easy as it seems. Not every day with the person you love is a walk in the park – nor should it be – it’s natural to experience a romantic slump. Every couple goes through it and will most likely come out stronger. Even though it would be great to get back to the way the relationship first felt like in the beginning, the reality is that that initial feeling may never return to the way it once was because your love has now matured and grown more sustainable – which in the end, is probably a more successful way of maintaining a lifelong bond with the one you love. But, after the ‘doey-eyed honey-moon phase’ eventually ends many people find themselves struggling to keep the romance and intimacy alive. The spark begins to fizzle and everything becomes a little too predictable. The alarm sounds at 6AM. Some, staring into the same bowl of muesli, contemplate their day: work, meetings, afternoon Pilates…it's Thursday so that means they have to cook dinner. They kiss their partner in a hurried rush out the door and before they know it they’re back slumped on the couch beside them flicking through the channels on TV, too exhausted to get out and try something new. Like maybe when they were younger, or had more energy or simply when they had more time. If this sounds like you, then your jam-packed schedule has forced you and your partner into a comfortable, yet boring, routine. Couples who do the same thing day in and day out will eventually fall into a relationship rut. It’s boring and frustrating and isolating and everything terrible you can imagine. But it’s understandable. Life gets in the way – plain and simple – work, family, friends, children and hobbies are all commitments which sometimes get in the way of spending time with a special loved one. If you’re looking for ways to add some spice and flavor back into your daily grind but are an organisational robot who doesn’t have the time; try ‘scheduling’ spontaneity with your partner. Set aside time each day in your routine to get out with your partner; try new things, do new things, experience new places and see new faces. To avoid falling into a boring routine with your partner or spouse, take a look at these 6 things you can do to bring the spark back into a potentially fizzling relationship. 1. Create a 'couples bucket list' This is a great idea you can try to get out of your comfort zone and to feel closer to each other. A lot of bonding is created by experiencing new and exciting things together. This list can be whatever you choose to make it – from the small (e.g: attending a cooking class, going to the theatre, visiting the local markets every Sunday morning) to the big (e.g: booking your dream holiday, completing a marathon, opening a business, skydiving) this list is bound to rejuvenate and inspire you both. By working together to create a list of things you want to do as a couple you are reconnecting your thoughts and energising each other’s ideas. Not only is making the list fun, but implementing it is even better! Each weekend schedule in at least one bucket list activity and organise it over the coming week. Once it comes to weekend make sure you and your partner get out and tackle or enjoy whatever challenge is set. 2. Join a social sports team or start a new hobby together For couples who enjoy staying active and participating in social sports, why not try joining a club sport together? Find out what sport is best suited to each other’s physical abilities and join in! Not only will training and matches be scheduled each week for your spontaneous convenience, but so will time spent outside the house working in a team environment with your partner. Also the co-operation and team work skills practiced in the sport will pay off within your relationship at home; better cooperation and communication on field means better support and openness at home. If sports really just aren’t for you, try starting a hobby or taking a class with your partner. This means you're learning something new. Doing this together will make you both feel more connected and help you discover parts of your relationship that you never knew existed. 3. Indulge in a weekend away One of the best ways to bring spontaneity back into your relationship is a complete change in scenery. Pack your bags, pile into the car and plan a getaway for the weekend to a new place you’ve never been before. This can bring new romantic feelings back because you and your loved one are setting off to explore something new and unknown together. 4. Switch household chores Quite often when couples live together they naturally fall into a scheduled chore routine. This may mean that one always takes out the trash, collects the mail and cooks, whilst the other always pays the monthly bills, mows the lawn and cleans up after dinner. Try breaking these household routines! If you switch these domestic, mundane roles around it can add spontaneity in your daily routine as your partner won't be expecting it and view it as a nice gesture. In addition, you may also find a new appreciation for things your partner does around the house that you never noticed before. Gratitude is key to healthy relationship. 5. Turn the TV off One of the biggest intimacy killers threatening our generation is the overwhelming presence of smart phone devices and screens in our living rooms, bedrooms and dinner tables. Smart phones, tablets and media playing devices are distracting and destroy your ability to be 100 per cent present. Ever tried to have a conversation with someone mindlessly scrolling through their phone? Most people find they weren’t being listened to, or felt what they had to say mustn’t have been important. Each night when you and your partner return home try and abstain from automatically flicking on the TV or checking your emails/notifications. Instead, make sure all gadgets and communication devices are turned off and schedule 30 minutes of tech-free time discussing your day. This gives couples a chance to really connect and engage without interruptions. 6. Leave each other love notes This one is fun, easy and will make you feel all giddy and childish, just like when you first met. During the day make an effort to write and leave small, handwritten love notes around the house for your partner to unexpectedly find. Try leaving the notes in places only they may go e.g: near their toothbrush, on their bedside table, inside their briefcase, laundry basket, pillow or even inside their car! Little surprises like this will remind your partner how you feel about them – and will undoubtedly make their day! Who doesn’t want mini love letters addressed to them?! For busy couples who just can’t seem to find the time, these scheduled ‘spontaneous’ activities will be sure to re-energise any relationship and enhance one's lust, appreciation and love.
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get twogether exists to build global friendships through local conversations by allowing our users to share their special experiences with friends. We understand the difficulty faced by couples who desire more friends with similar interests and priorities, but lack the time, knowledge and resources to branch out on their own. So, we've spent countless hours researching, developing and refining our idea to provide couples with an easy-to-use, intuitive platform that allows them to seek out meaningful social relationships with other couples. And well, we think we've nailed it.